Has this happened to you?
You’ve been part of the same standing meeting for months, maybe even years, and suddenly you’re no longer invited.
You’ve always participated in interview panels for your group. A new hiring cycle begins, and this time, you’re not included.
A long-term client or project you’ve worked on for years is reassigned.
Your manager asks you to redesign your schedule or shift responsibilities, even though your performance has been strong.
Individually, each situation has a reasonable explanation. But together they often leave people with the same reaction:
Something changed. But no one told me what.
These are exactly the moments career coach Diane Fennig explored in Forté’s Career Coach session, “Before You Quit: Early Signs You May Need Role Realignment.” Many professionals interpret experiences like these as a message that the organization no longer values them and begin planning an exit. Fennig’s advice was different. Before deciding what it means, first try to understand what actually changed.
Start here
The first instinct in these moments is to react. You want to send a frustrated email, confront a colleague, or quietly start job searching.
Fennig recommended doing something harder. Slow down long enough to understand what changed.
Being removed from a meeting or project feels personal, but it may reflect a shift in team priorities, responsibilities, or development plans rather than a judgment about your performance."
Start by separating the event from the story you are telling yourself about it. Being removed from a meeting or project feels personal, but it may reflect a shift in team priorities, responsibilities, or development plans rather than a judgment about your performance.
Before drawing conclusions, talk it through with people you trust. Fennig suggested building a small “advisory board,” a mentor, a senior colleague, or a peer who understands your work. Their perspective can help you make sense of what you’re seeing.
Then meet with your manager. Explain what you’ve noticed and ask where they want your effort and attention going forward. These situations often feel like something was taken away, but they can also mean priorities are shifting. A follow up conversation helps you understand whether you’re being excluded or redirected.
If you want to stay
If you want to stay, communicate that directly. Tell your manager you’re committed to the work and ask where you can contribute most. Fennig also recommended volunteering for stretch assignments or new projects. Initiative helps leadership see how you operate and can re-energize your engagement.
If you decide to leave
Sometimes the conclusion is that it’s time to move on. In that case, Fennig advised making a plan before exiting. Leaving without another role lined up can be much harder in today’s hiring environment, and gaps often raise questions for employers. Just as important, avoid burning bridges. Colleagues move to new organizations, and relationships often shape future opportunities. As she reminded participants, changing roles is not starting over. You’re moving forward with experience.
The takeaway
The instinct in these situations is to jump to a conclusion: they don’t value me, I’m being pushed out, I should leave.
Fennig encouraged something different. Not because nothing is happening, but because you may not yet understand what it is.
Organizations rarely communicate change through direct feedback. More often, it shows up through decisions about who is included in conversations, how work is assigned, and where responsibilities move.
- Is the team moving in a new direction?
- Are different skills needed right now?
- Is someone else being given a development opportunity?
- Is your role evolving into something broader?
A conversation with your manager can clarify whether you are being sidelined or repositioned. Only after you understand that should you decide whether to stay or go.
